Friday, January 9

gazing at faces

"Family faces are magic mirrors. Looking at people who belong to us, we see the past, present, and future." ~ Gail Lumet Buckley

As I get older, I have found that I enjoy gazing at our family's faces. Soaking in all the impressions that make them who they are and seeing other family members features in those glances. Some things are easy to spot as distinctions such as the hairline from my husband's side of the family which all the boys seem to have, especially as they get older. The ones with eyes of blue that want to turn green or the deep chocolate brown of others or the daughter with the eyes that sparkle. Those apple cheeks and dimples, too. Such variety in each one.

And yet, there is something that others see that connects all our children as being in the same family. Knowing that causes me to gaze and wonder....what is it that is common to all? Perhaps I'll never figure that out no matter how much I gaze and wonder.

But there's something that I've noticed much more prominently lately whether in pictures taken at a certain angle or a glance in the mirror. I see my mother in me. For a brief moment I gaze and wonder....what is it that causes the resemblance? The nose? The eyes? The face shape? The smile? Something that is noticeable to me as I'm getting older.

It is a bittersweet thing as it makes me sad and happy at the same moment. Sad because it instantly makes me miss her presence in my life and happy because as time goes on I'm afraid of forgetting certain things about her and "seeing" her in myself helps me to remember.

To would have been my mom's 71st birthday. May my mirror reveal a smile with the tears as I glance at a familiar face found in mine.

Tammy ~@~


ValleyGirl said...

This is a beautiful post, Tammy. {{hugs}}

Heasleye said...

Such sweet sentiments you've captured here. May you have a special day of remembrance, Tammy.

A. said...

Lovely thoughts.

I've noticed that the older I get, the more I look like my mother. Up until 15 or so, I was the spitting image of my father. How interesting this stuff it...


Mrs. E. said...

You express yourself so beautifully, Tammy. Thank you for sharing. Your mom would be sooo proud.

Kimmie said...


Your mom did a great job with you, she must have been very proud of you.

Sorry some tears fell, but so glad that you still get to see her in your mirror from time to time. What a wonderful occasional reminder of her and of how much she means to you.

Sometimes when I laugh and I amsqueeze my eyes really hard -I get a flash of my father's laughter-his great belly laughs that I miss...and for a moment, I hear him in my voice and see him doing the same face...for a second time is back to when he was with me. I miss him too.

I am not sure my dad was a Christian...was your mom?

mama to 6
one homemade and 5 adopted

theArthurClan said...

I also see my mother when I look in the mirror...I can't even imagine a day when she is no longer here on this earth with me.

I hope that you were able to have a day of happy memories of your mother even in the midst of the sadness of losing her. (((hugs)))

Anonymous said...

Tammy - I'm so sorry your mom isn't here. At the age of 71 -- well, that just seems too young to be gone. We're confronting some aging parent issues in our family that are a challenge, but I frankly can't imagine the day coming when they're not here. They are both in poor health - Dad had his first heart attack in 1977, for heaven's sake - and sometimes it seems we've had him on borrowed time. Then again - what time isn't borrowed, right?

I was adopted as a baby, but just love that the older I get, the more I see and hear both my mom and dad's mannerisms, expressions, laughs, and sounds in myself. I'm grateful for that!


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