Thursday, October 14

repeat after me

Who would ever think that you'd have to pull out one of the same parenting tools you used with your toddlers to use with your teenagers?  But it's true!  

I think that perhaps one of the best toddler tips that someone gave me back in the ancient days was when needing to tell your toddler something important (or even not important) you needed to squat down to their level, look them in the eye, tell them whatever it was, then have them repeat it back to you so you had no doubt that they heard and understood.  It helps cement whatever it was in your mind because sometimes mothers forget things in their busy days (perhaps I'm the only one?) AND in their mind because sometimes they aren't listening or don't understand.  It's a method that really does help when training a child in the toddler years.

Then you hit the smoother middle years where they do know and do what they've been trained.

Then you hit the teenage frame of mind where they look blankly at you when you ask them about something that they should know or do or heard you remind them about.

It's at moments like that when you try to figure out what to do and you remember an old parenting method that needs to be revived.  You look at them face to face, tell them whatever it is, then have them repeat it back to you so you have no doubt that they heard and understood.  It can be a tad bit exasperating when it is about things you know they know and should be automatically doing but aren't; however, if you can stay calm and collected when you do this they will never know you are using a toddler parenting method on them and it holds them up to a level of responsibility and accountability that is necessary as they near adulthood.

Ahhh, yes, perhaps the best part of being an older parent is knowing that all these stages pass and there will be a day when they will enjoy engaging with you as much as you enjoy engaging with them because they grow into wonderful adults who you look forward to spending time with when you can.

Until then.......repeat after me......

Tammy ~@~


The Prude said...

So THAT is why my husband takes me by the shoulders and bends down to look in my eyes when he gives me some task :)
I bookmarked your page! You join such august company as Quiet Life,John MacArthur, and a recipe for Starbucks Cranberry Bliss scones.

mom said...

LOL, Anita! But the question is.....does it help when he does that? And yay for being in good company. I may have to ask you though to share the link for the cranberry bliss scones. It is cranberry season here right now.....

Tammy ~@~

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